Tuesday, May 21, 2013

I Am Still Here...

I can't believe it has been almost a whole month since I have been able to write.  I have dealt with many things that I would have preferred not to, but what's new, right?  I feel pretty good, but there have been more than a few dark days.  I have reached out to and retreated from so much.  But, bottom line....I am still here!
Right now, today, I am retreating from the sadness of the tornado damage in Oklahoma...so many human and animal lives have been lost, and so much injury and devastation.  Things like this, I can't watch.  I can only take it in incrementally, because the pain and suffering is beyond me.  So for a few days, I will be filtering all that I see and read and hear about it.  It is simply too much.  If it was close by geographically, well, I think I would be there trying to help the animals, or the children.  Mostly the animals.  It is heartbreaking, no matter how you try to look at it.  And it is not the will of any God of mine.  It is interesting that it killed and injured  many horses, given that Oklahoma has been determined to pass the legislation to open a horse slaughter plant in their state.  It is unusual for horses to be brought to the forefront of such a tragedy, but the sheer numbers of  the lives lost in horrible ways has made it 'newsworthy'.
I could go on, but I won't .  I will try to do a bit of blogging each day so that I can get things back on track here.  My children have been huge players in my emotional mess this past month.  I have finally had to step back from them so that I can continue my own growth and life.  Of course, now I feel alone, and I have to deal with that.  I think there is less stress for me right now in being alone.  I have no lack of things to do, so keeping busy is the key for me right now.
Business has not been very good, a karmic thing, and seems to be getting back on track now that I have done something about the negative vibe invasion.  I can only wait and see how things go..if sales pick up or get worse.  I am feeling very positive about it all, though, so I am going to have a good inventory for people to shop through.
Anyway, I have run out of words for now.  I will be back, though.  I have let me mind get so scattered that I am having trouble reining everything back into order.  It will come...
I wish you a day filled with peace and love....

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