Saturday, July 9, 2016

The Value of a Life

I am so sad.  I look at this beautiful world of ours, and wonder what, if anything, will be left of it when my children are my age.  I look at the disgraceful actions of people against other people, spurred on by the media and the government here in the United States. 'United' doesn't seem to fit into the name of our country anymore.  Maybe the Disunited States, or the  Untied States, or something else that is more fitting; does that make more sense?
I spent a lot of time in my first life being victimized for my lack of prejudice.  No, I  don't mean that I was colorblind.  I just liked people based on who they were;  not once considering skin color, sexuality, age, socioeconomic status, or any other divisive reasoning.  I know that this attitude is really a part of me, because I feel even more strongly about it in my second life. 
There is so much hatred in the  atmosphere now; it hangs in the  air like the stifling July humidity.
It is pervasive, and makes me take pause when considering something as mundane as going to the grocery store.  Never have I felt so unprotected, and I shudder to think of how it must feel to be Muslim, or African-American, or a police officer's spouse.  I want to hear some good news for a change.  Surely there is some good news! 
Well, I have to go out and get those groceries.  I have to face the fact that going anywhere is basically risking life and death.  I don't want to feel this way, but I am not going to lie about it, either.  No one is safe now.  Not even the pretense of feeling safe is available.  It is sad....not just for me, but for everyone and everything. 
I'm kinda mad, too.  I took my own life to escape from being a victim, only to scratch and fight for 5 years to become grown and whole and happy.  Now I am faced with the reality that we are all potential victims.  And that the person in line in front or behind or beside me at the store or restaurant or gas station or movie might go over the edge and cause us to become the next headline or leading news story..... another tragedy in this seemingly endless outbreak of hate.
I will go, and I will smile and look people in the eye, and maybe I will be lucky enough to witness an act of kindness instead.  That is all one can hope for, I guess.
I bid you peace and joy and love.